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Steven W. Noles, Psy.D.
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PARENT EXPECTATIONS
FOR A YOUTH SPORTS COACH
Parents
of children involved in youth sports have certain expectations about
the
type of experience they desire for their son or daughter. Often
the expectations
of the parents are not consistent with what a coach tries to
accomplish.
The result is usually bad feelings of hurt and anger; sometimes
such a situation has ended tragically. What needs to happen to prevent
this situation? The answer is that expectations need to be clearly
stated
and followed to the best of everyone's ability.
The
following is a list of reasonable expectations parents can have of
their
child's youth sport coach. The team rules and expectations for
appropriate
behavior should be discussed at the very first practice so that
everyone,
players and parents, know what they are. Here is a list of some
reasonable expectations:
- Every player
should be treated in a similar manner and always with respect.
There should
be no favorites. One way to test this is to see if the coach
treats his\her
own son or daughter different from the other children on the
team. If you
did not know, you should not be able to tell which child is the coach's
son or daughter.
- Emphasize
on the need to have fun.
- Help the
players improve as players and as individuals.
- Help players
set realistic individual goals and help them reach them.
- Set appropriate
team goals for the season.
- Remember
and reinforce the idea that sports are like life and that lifelong
lessons
are to be learned.
- Keep the
parents informed of upcoming events, changes in schedules and other
issues
as soon as they become apparent.
- Serve as
an appropriate role model for the children.
- Hold brief,
but positive meetings after every competition regardless of game
outcome.
- Deal with
inappropriate player behavior by encouraging more appropriate actions;
consequences, where possible, should be applicable for all players and
appropriate for the player's age. Coaches should be ready to bench a
player,
regardless of skill level, for inappropriate behavior or for setting a
bad example.
- All team
slogans and chants should be positive, encouraging, and meaningful to
the
players.
- Find positives
in every player.
- Avoid open
criticism of the referees and umpires.
- Avoid negative
and derogatory comments about the opposing coaches and players.
- Place appropriate
emphasis on effort rather than on the outcome of the competition.
- Whenever
the team is together, the goal should be to bring the team closer
together.
- All team
equipment should be well-maintained and safe to use.
- The coach
should handle player frustrations in a caring, understanding
manner.
- Teach players
to value and respect their opponents, the officials, and the fans.
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